Monday, August 25, 2008

What's really irresponsible

I never meant for this blog to be political in any way and I have no hidden agenda in making this post. That being said here goes.

I hear politicians all the time saying it would be "irresponsible" to pull our troops out of Iraq. That we need to "stay the course" until the job is finished. Then I see the images of wounded soldiers on TV and read about the rising death tolls and I can't help but feel a little sick about the whole thing. Right, wrong, or indifferent I want our troops to come home now. And I don't think it's irresponsible to feel this way.

Irresponsible is racking up a national debt of $9.5 trillion, which increases by $1 million every minute. Here's a fun fact to consider: The US spends more on the annual interest of our debt than the sum total of all the dollars we've spent on the entire war on terror (so you can't blame the war alone for our national debt).

Irresponsible is knowing that genocide is taking place in Darfur and not doing a thing about it (because our military resources are tied up in the Middle East).

Irresponsible is being the only wealthy, industrialized nation that does not provide universal health care for its citizens.

Irresponsible is sending 4000 soldiers (exact total this morning was 4148) off to die in Iraq for a war that was started under false pretenses.

Irresponsible is focusing on foreign issues abroad when our economy is on the verge of a recession and over 750,000 people remain homeless in the United States.

Irresponsible is getting a blow job from your intern.

Irresponsible is covering up and falsifying the circumstances surrounding Pat Tillmans's death to avoid creating bad press for the war on terror.

Irresponsible is burning an irreparable hole in the Ozone Layer.

Irresponsible is allowing the transfer of US sovereignty to foreign governments through sovereign wealth funds thus creating a scenario where foreign governments have the ability to "blackmail" the United States into bending its policies to suit said foreign goverments (in short we've become China's bitch).

Pulling our troops out of Iraq is not irresponsible. No, simply put it's the right thing to do.

Friday, August 22, 2008

National Stop the Stupid Registry

Join Me – Sign on to Support a Stop the Stupid Registry

I just signed my name onto a petition asking Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, and Senate Majority Leader, Harry Reid, to support the creation of a Stop the Stupid Registry in the United States.

Please consider adding your name to the list of supporters calling for the creation of a National Stop the Stupid Registry.

Stupidity is more than just an annoyance; it's an environmental and societal crisis. Every day, inexplicable stupidity affects millions of lives in this country, creating as many bad decisions as the sum total of all bad decisions made during the entire combined presidencies of George W Bush and William J. Clinton.

We deserve the right to protect our intelligence and our ability to comprehend simple logic. We deserve rational decision making and cognitive reasoning. Sign our petition today and take back your intellectual prowess:

Thank You!

In all seriousness I think it’s time we accept the fact that the general public is generally stupid. I’m not trying to be mean or hurtful in making this statement. The fact is there are tens of thousands of people in this country far smarter than me. But in my extensive travels across the United States I’ve come to the inalienable conclusion that there are far more stupid people in this country than there are smart. I should quantify this statement by saying that I use the term stupid in a broad sense of the word. To me it encompasses not only a lack of intelligence but also things like ignorance, apathy, intolerance, obliviousness, and a lack of common sense. By this definition the general public is inundated with hordes of stupid people. Once you adopt this realization and align your expectations accordingly you will stop being constantly let down by society. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to think, care, tolerate, perceive, and exercise logic like you. So stop expecting it. Then when you do come across someone who’s smart, enlightened, compassionate, open-minded, observant, or rational, you’ll be pleasantly surprised. It’s okay to hope for the best in people so long as you’re prepared for the worst. This approach will help you to stay grounded in reality and prevent you from becoming disillusioned by the stupid society in which we live. Jaded or just keepin it real? Probably a little bit a both.

Monday, August 4, 2008

You might be a tool if...


Everyone's heard the Jeff Foxworthy bit "You might be a redneck if..." Pretty funny stuff if you can get past the Southern drawl. I went with the same format but changed the theme in order to capture a list of the annoying habits, behaviors, and characteristics of those people who nobody wants to spend time with or be associated with in any way. Those people we pity for their ignorance and lack of self awareness, yet want to punch in the face at the very same time. Those people we can't help but talk about and ridicule the moment they leave the room. Those people who I like to affectionately refer to as tools. A variation on this moniker might be tool box, tool chest, tool bag, or anything else clever you can come up with. Now for the list (which is an on-going work in progress). Please add your own items by posting a comment.

You might be a tool if...

You wear a bluetooth headset all the time, even when you're not talking on the phone. We all know this guy.

You've ever worn a fanny pack.

You bum rush the gate when the flight attendant calls your group number like you're dashing for the front row at a general admission rock concert (I know I know the overhead storage is limited which brings us to the next item on our list).

You insist on traveling with (2) huge carry-ons because you don't believe in checking luggage, and are subsequently the guy who slows down the entire boarding process as you struggle to jam your military sized duffle bags into the overhead compartments.

You tell people you hardly know about your problems.

You tuck your t-shirt into your jeans, with no belt of course.

You tell people you hardly know about your accomplishments.

You currently own a pair of jorts (jean shorts). If you owned a pair in the 80's you get a pass because I did too.

You're a dude and you know every step of the electric slide (this might also mean you're gay).

Your idea of a fun night out on the town includes karaoke.

You insist on splitting checks down to the penny when dining out with friends and you use a calculator to figure out the tip.

You consider video gaming to be a sport.

You prefer futbol over football (you get a pass if you're foreign).

You currently own a Member's Only jacket. Again if you owned one in the 80's you get a pass because hell, who didn't?

You sing excessively loud at church or during the national anthem because you think you have a good voice and want other people to hear it.

You've ever practiced your cool walk in the mirror before unleashing it on the public.

Your ipod contains any song from any boy band ever.

Your personal license plate reads: IPLY2WN (I just saw this deuche on the road a few days ago).

You've ever worn a mesh tank top (this might also be another sign that you're gay).

You roll up the sleeves of your t-shirt to show of your guns.

You spend more time playing fantasy football than you do watching actual football.

You've ever worn a pair of Crocs (even if you've just worn them around the house that counts too).

You've altered your car in any way to make it louder.

You can't walk by a mirror without flexing.

You're a dude and you have a pony tail (this only looks cool if you're Steven Segal).

Your personal license plate reads: WNRGOHM (this f*ck must live by me because I see him on the road constantly).

You coach kid's soccer and suit up in full uniform (down to the shin guards) for practices and games.

You drive around in your car with your shirt off (if you're this guy you're likely driving a mustang or a camaro).

You work out at the gym in a wife beater.

You've ever worn matching outfits with your wife or girlfriend (I don't care how hot she is or how whipped you are - still unacceptable).

You have any kind of personalized license plate.

You drive an H2 or gulp, an H3.