Thursday, August 13, 2009

Ambien CR Commercial - Unbelievable

Holy shit – was that a commercial I just watched or a 60 second disclaimer intended to scare the crap out of me? Let me get this straight. The down side of taking Ambien CR is that I might get out of bed in the middle of the night with a hankering for chorizo, drive down to the local Filiberto’s to get my grub on, decide to walk to the bar next door and hit on some dude’s girlfriend, punch him in the face when he confronts me, shroom out and see pink and green elephants in the back of the cop car on the way to the pokey, get gang raped by a group of drunken trannies in the holding cell while the officer I just insulted conveniently looks the other way, wake up the next morning with a sore ass and no recollection as to why, and have a sudden urge to kill myself with the plastic shiv I stole from one of the trannies the night before (assuming my grotesquely swollen tongue hasn’t already done the job). And the upside is I actually stay asleep for 7 to 8 hours, wake up with a bad case of the grogs, and more than likely shit myself on the way to the can. Um… thanks but I think I’ll stick with Vodka and Advil PM.

An excerpt from the Sanofi-Aventis web site:

(and this shit is 100% legal while marijuana is not – go figure)


AMBIEN and AMBIEN CR are treatment options you and your doctor can consider along with lifestyle changes. When taking either of them, don’t drive or operate machinery. Plan to devote 7 to 8 hours to sleep before being active. Sleepwalking, and eating or driving while not fully awake, with memory loss for the event, as well as abnormal behaviors such as being more outgoing or aggressive than normal, confusion, agitation, and hallucinations may occur. Don’t take it with alcohol as it may increase these behaviors. In patients with depression, worsening of depression, including risk of suicide may occur. If you experience any of these behaviors contact your doctor immediately. Allergic reactions such as shortness of breath, swelling of your tongue or throat, may occur and in rare cases may be fatal. If you have an allergic reaction while using AMBIEN or AMBIEN CR, contact your doctor immediately. Side effects of AMBIEN CR may include next-day drowsiness, dizziness and headache. There is a low occurrence of side effects associated with the short-term use of AMBIEN. The most commonly observed side effects in controlled clinical trials were drowsiness, dizziness, and diarrhea. AMBIEN is taken for 7 to 10 days –or longer as advised by your provider. AMBIEN CR can be taken as long as your doctor recommends. AMBIEN and AMBIEN CR have some risk of dependency. They are non-narcotic.


Cr0n_J0b said...

I like that they say you shouldn't drive while on ambiem, but warn that you probably will...only you won't remember it. Maybe it's just me, but this sounds like a perfect pre-rave warm-up medication.

Ramesh said...

I still took forever to fall asleep, very restless throughout the night. I was also one of the unfortunate ones who suffered the side effects of waking up and not realizing it. ie-shopping online and not knowing until the next day.